Tips on life

Posted on April 4, 2010 at 3:03 AM

When in doubt, mumble.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
The fall doesn't kill you, its that part at the end where you stop that does
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
Wear sunscreen
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
You think you want a career, all you really want is a paycheck
When ever you are filling out a form and it says "incase of an emergency, list who to contact" always write "DOCTOR". What the heck is your mom going to do for you?
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
(and the best tip of all) all you need in life is a little WILL power!